In late 2017, Ramsey Solutions conducted a study on money and marriage. Based on the study, they found that money is the number one issue married couples fight about and the second leading cause of divorce. Everyone has their own money story. When two people come together in marriage, it also involves their money stories coming together. In this article, I’ll highlight different ways money can be a resource and not a problem in your marriage.
Money can be a taboo topic, especially in a relationship. However, it is necessary to have open and honest conversations about money to develop a better understanding of your partner’s money situation. It may not always be an easy conversation, but the ability to have tough conversations about money can uncover any issues on the front end rather than discovering a surprise later on down the road. Not only can having tough conversations about money deepen your relationship, it can also make you both more comfortable in bringing up hard issues in the future.
A prime example of a tough conversation for young couples is debt. Whether it is student loans, an auto loan, or credit card debt, many young individuals carry debt. Making your partner aware of the debts you have before combining your finances can help you both prepare to repay the debt early on, rather than letting it continue to accrue interest. Open communication not only builds trust, it can also help relieve the burden of your partner, knowing that you’ll share the responsibility with them in repaying this debt.
Money conversations in relationships do not have to be dreadful. Having a conversation about your future and setting financial goals in your relationship can give you purpose and a sense of unity. It can be helpful if you intentionally set time aside. For example, you could have a money conversation over dinner on the first Sunday of each month. Whether it’s buying a house, paying for your children’s tuition, or saving for retirement, having aligned goals can help you make smart money decisions for your future.
When working together on your household finances, it’s important for both parties to be involved. Having both parties work together on a household budget can help you understand one another’s priorities and the lifestyle you can afford to live. When both parties take responsibility for the household finances, it also fosters a sense of equality and joint commitment in the relationship. Although it’s hard to think about, one day you won’t be there for your partner. Sharing the responsibility of your household finances with them throughout your lifetime can help them be better prepared to handle their finances at the time of passing.
The importance of talking about money in your marriage goes beyond the day-to-day activities you do. It also includes your long-term plans. Questions such as how you’ll fund retirement, your children’s education, and what kind of legacy you want to leave may seem far off in the future. However, talking with each other about these items today can help you all develop a plan for your future, providing clarity on the steps to take to reach your goals. Having these conversations early in the marriage can allow for better preparation and financial well-being later in life.
Just as no two people are the same, no two people’s money personalities are the same. Understanding each other’s money personalities can help you in supporting the money decisions they make. It can also help you both work on improving areas where the other may be lacking. Overall, by developing an understanding of your partner’s money personality it can lead to better money habits for your marriage.
When taking your partner’s hand in marriage, you’re also taking their hand as your business partner. By understanding money’s role in your marriage, you can create a strong and mutually supportive marriage that thrives on shared values, effective communication, and collaborative decision-making.
Money, marriage, and Communication. Ramsey Solutions. (n.d.). https://www.ramseysolutions.com/relationships/money-marriage-communication-research
-by Jacob Young, AAMS®
Financial Advisor, RJFS
313 East 10th Ave. • Bowling Green, KY 42101 • Phone: 270-846-2656
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