As Fall trickles in among us, changing our horizons leaf by leaf, the rhythm of our lives begin to change again. The time we’ve dedicated to sports begins to die down and the family Fall activities rev up. Maybe it’s the leaves turning shades of orange and red, maybe it’s the crisp mornings or the cozy evenings, maybe it’s all the events that the season brings about, but Autumn is my personal favorite season. This window of time never feels like it lasts long enough.
We recently took our family to the Smoky Mountains for a stretch of days over Fall Break. My in-laws will be celebrating 50 years of marriage next month so we made our vacation away a big family vacation that included everyone: cousins, moms, dads, aunts, uncles, grandma, grandpa… the whole crew. Thirteen of us piled up under one roof, gathered around one table, and created some more mountain memories that are sure to last a lifetime.
Watching the grandparents interact with their grandchildren, I couldn’t help but think about 50 years of marriage; how many highs, how many lows, how many mundane days wedged between the good days and bad ones. I wondered how many times they had to forgive each other to get to this point. How many adventures they’d been on together. The things they’d compromised on. How many times their hearts filled to the brim with warmth and joy and pride as they watched their children’s accomplishments – and now to witness their children’s children accomplish other wonderful things, too. The evolution of marriage, of life, over all these years must feel like a roller coaster.
In the three years Brandon and I have been married, there have been more apologies than I can count, more times that we’ve disappointed each other than I’d like to admit. There has also been so much laughter. So much happiness. So many nights that I’ve looked at him from across the table and thought, “I can’t believe this is our life… how fortunate we are.” It’s my prayer that I’m raising kids who can say the same thing, too.
I took a lot of pictures over the week, and as I stood behind the camera, snapping both candids and portraits, I felt so honored to bear witness of this time. Mamaw playing cards and pool and dice with her grandchildren. Papaw looking out over the landscape with his son and grandsons. I watched it all from what felt like a bird’s eye view, knowing very well that one day too soon from now, these minutes will be a memory. Losing my own grandparents recently has reminded me how brief life is, and now when I look back at pictures of me with them, I wonder if the person behind the camera knew the same thing. I wonder if they knew when their fingers snapped the picture that those minutes would one day just be a tiny image on the reel of precious memories I play over and store in my mind.
To gift our kids these moments – these memories, with these people they know and love, was surely a gift to our own selves.
I don’t know if Brandon and I will live long enough to reach 50 years of marriage, but I hope we do. And I hope that it will look like loading up our entire family and driving to the mountains to camp out and celebrate a legacy of “I’m sorrys” and “thank yous” and “I love yous” and “I can’t believe this is our beautiful life.”
-by Destini McPherson
